Groundhog Daze

We are a grand old species all the same. A hominid filled with self importance and sophisticated concepts of our place in the universe.

We have a great way of recording our achievements as shrines to our greatness. We’ve had the Renaissance, the Enlightenment, the Industrial Revolution and the Information Age to name but a few. All of them linear paths for linear thinkers.

Civilisation we are thought runs thus: the Greeks beget the Romans, the Romans beget the British and the British beget the United States of America. One glorious leap forward after another. This is of course complete bunkum. Point out the gaps in this chronological history of convenience and someone might tell you you’re living in the Dark Ages.

When Cathal MacCoille yesterday pointed out that “we’ve been here before” regarding the Grace Child Abuse case, I replied that “the one thing we learn from history, is that we never learn from history”. How can we hope to learn from history when the very history we a taught is as limited as a 140 character tweet.

Everyday new evidence emerges showing that, rather than the enlightened creatures we believe ourselves to be, most of us are like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day. Destined to live the same mundane existence day in and day out. Drifting along in a lazy river of the unremarkable. Round and round we go.

It is on this fetid water that we watch our politicians bobbing along on again. The noxious creature that is the Irish Water Groundhog has waited inline, gotten his inflatable tube and is back for another ride.

We are told that Fine Gael will not eliminate charges that risk the ire of the EU Commission; never mind that we are separately prodding the EU Commission with sh1t on a stick over the Apple Tax ruling. Whatever you do, do not mention that when both Spain and Portugal were to be fined €2bn and €300m respectively, for breaches of the EU Commissions Budgetary Rules (rules more sacred than water charges) that the fines were reduced to €0.

The shield of “advice of the attorney general” is is more a badge of convenience to those who have already lost the war on water charges. All Minister Coveney is doing, one might argue, is delaying the inevitable in order to support his Fine Gael leadership candidacy.

Irish Water is a lame duck utility. People who paid previously will not re-register. Those who never paid, never will. Throwing shapes at each other for marginal political gains stinks almost as bad as the commentariat deriding the public for seeing through this entire charade form its conception.

The Minority Government and the Faux Opposition are pretend-arguing over what is or is not excessive water use. Really? All you are doing is excessively trying the public’s patience. The Half-Dead Irish Water Groundhog needs to be put out of its misery. The use of excessive force won’t be necessary.


Tony Groves March 2017 groundhog-day-bill-murray-phil



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